On August 8, 2005 a category 5 hurricane, with winds as strong as 175km/hr, slammed into the Eastern coastline of North America. The damage from the disaster was estimated at 108 billion dollars and has been documented as the costliest on record. Approximately 1245 people died during the hurricane and subsequent flooding making it one of the five deadliest hurricanes in the United States. That was Hurricane Katrina.
Do you remember watching the aftermath in New Orleans? Almost every industry was affected. Hundreds of thousands were left without a job and over one million were displaced because their homes were destroyed thus making it the largest diaspora in US history. The rest of us watched in horror as thousands had no other choice but to use the Louisiana Superdome as their temporary home. Can you imagine having to take your children or your aging parents and stand in line to get a spot to sleep, knowing that you have no home, no belongings and no job to go back to? I can’t even fathom the turmoil of that reality.
The most heart wrenching part was when unspeakable events started to happen “under the dome”. Rape, rage, assault, murder, screaming, fighting, theft and the list goes on. I’m not even referring to the events themselves, as horrific as they were. I’m referring to how we, as outsiders, responded to them.
I remember a conversation I had with a woman at the time, it’s as clear as day. She couldn’t believe what animals “those” people were being. With utter disgust in her voice she reiterated a news article about all those filthy, evil people and their heinous crimes against each other and how she would never behave like that.. How dare they?
As she said that, all I could think was, “You stupid woman. You have the heart of a Pharisee.”
The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed: “God, I thank you I am not like other people-robbers, evil-doers, adulterers-or even like this tax collector”.
Given the same circumstances, the same upbringing, same genetic code, same parents, same disaster, job loss, turmoil, living conditions and the list goes on and on…..we cannot definitively say that we would not do the same or some of the same things. I laugh at myself here a little. I am no better than the woman I just called out. I judge her for judging them! In my heart I say, “How could she be so judgmental and unkind….I would never do that!” I guess it shows that there is a little Pharisee in all of us.
At some level, we love to measure ourselves up against another’s short comings to assure ourselves that we are ok. That we are in fact better.
Instead, what if we contemplate what it might be like to walk in their shoes, and lead with empathy and compassion instead of judgement?
That’s my challenge to all of us the next time we see a mother parenting in a way that we would never, or dressing in a way we find offensive, or posting something we totally disagree with. Have your opinions, but share them through the lenses of compassion and empathy.
